colskeezblog

London commuter fun

I work approx 9 miles from where I live:

Journey to work: 2hr 10 mins by car
Journey home: 2hr 45 mins (same car)

Hate to tell you this, but London is seriously f*cked.

Above the law

Some tw@t of a cyclist had the  sheer nerve to stick two fingers up at me on the way in to work this morning. Why?. Because I (atop the vespa obv) stopped slightly over the designated cycle lane path as said cyclist was attempting to tour-de-france through the red lights. Now I could be wrong, but I'm sure Red means STOP and also includes those dumb enough to brave London traffic wearing nothing but lycra and oakley shades for protection. Gah, makes me mad I tell you!

Hounslow: why?

Had a little mission to complete in Heathrow last night, but my driver and I got a bit lost and we ended up in a part of the world called Houslow. Deary me. what a dump.

Fear Factor

A friend of mine got knocked off his scooter yesterday, Thankfully he escaped with nothing other than a few scapes and bruises. His bike with need a bit of TLC though. My commute today was a little hectic to say the least and  I think I now have sufficient knowledge of London streets to give you a top 5 of the road users most likely to kill a motorcyclist. Enjoy!

1. Black Cabs: They really don't give a shit. Pulling out with little to no indication, tailgaiting, agressive driving. It's all there baby.

2. Double Decker Buses: Maybe they really can't see you, maybe the drivers are simply blind. Whatever. You'd be hard pushed to find a collective of more inconsiderate road users. I saw a cyclist pull up in front of a bus shortly after his near-death experience and proceed to rip off the front windscreen wipers. I could only smile.

3. White Vans: Okay I know the vehichle belongs to the company, therefore any damage / human remains can simply be explained away but come on: do you really have to get to the next job so quickly that human life no longer matters?

4. Trucks / Lorries: Thankfully these usually move pretty sluggishly but they * really * can't see you so my advice would be to keep a serious distance...and go easy on the overtaking. You get in a row with one of these and it's curtains.

5. Golf Drivers: This ain't Le mans bitch!. Why is it that the VW badge turns normal people into complete a-holes on the road. Again, stop with the tailgaiting you're only going home to watch EastEnders. The jury is still out on Polo drivers but expect a full update sometime soon.

Vespa ET2 one month in...

So, I've now been the proud owner of Bessie, my Blue Vespa ET2 for a month now and I have to say I'm a convert. Bessie ( hey, blame the previous owner) is just perfect for those little missions to the parents or to pick up some last minute shopping etc. Obviously, travelling amoungst London traffic will always have a certain medium to high death-risk factor attached to it, but I've so far managed to escape collision with a White van or perhaps even worse, a double decker Bus.

Anyone looking for a Scoooter could do a lot worse than the ET2, it's a stylish little beast and takes off at the lights fairly quickly. One thing you should be aware of though is that this model is fully automatic or , as they say,'twist and go' Beware, this does exactly what it says on the tin. So, twisting when you are in front of a stationery object should be avoided at all costs!